I have always had a bit of an obsessive personality. When I really start something, I am in it. Like 300%. But I think I may have topped myself this time. This whole weight loss thing is taking over my life. In a good way. I have never been so committed in my life. It used to diet, work out for a week, complain cause it didn’t work, then quit. Then eat cause I was sad. This time its totally different straight to the point where I think I have just passed dedication, even obsession and stepped right into crazy town.

Not only do I have spread sheets GALORE, food scales, calorie counters…ect but now I’m trying to figure out how I can afford that damn arm band counter they have on Biggest Loser. Its called a BodyBugg I think and its ridiculously expensive and requires a monthly subscription but I am convinced I NEED it. IT COUNTS YOUR CALORIES WHILE YOU SLEEP! ZOMG. I know I have bought things like this that I’m convinced I need, then I dont use. I also have no job so I will refrain from buying it, but it would be nice to have an accurate account of what I’m burning a day.

Last night was my nieces 1st birthday party. I couldn’t weight my food or measure it and I felt completely lost. I didn’t know what to eat or how much or anything so I just like ate a little of most stuff. And then I had a cupcake. No frosting but I still felt like I was nuts to do that (Oh hey crazy lady, how are you?) Yea. I know its getting overboard. BUT its also getting easier. Not only eating really well, but the working out. Like I really don’t feel like I’m on a diet right now, I still eat almost anything I want just really controlled. And today while I was on the treadmill, not only did I do 70 minutes, but for the FIRST TIME IN LIFE….the longer I was on…the easier it got. No shit, thats not a lie. Seriously, at like 40 minutes or so the intervals got easier, I could go faster, and I wasn’t annoyed when my rest period was up. Its motivating as all get out.

So back to my butt, which is why this blog exists. I went to Cleveland this week to get injected with steroids again. I met the on site Pyoderma guy. He seems to know his shit. But…I managed to stump him too. He said he normally treats pyoderma with A) Oral steroids, and B) Remicaid! Awesome 2 things I can’t have. Oral ‘roids right now will seriously hurt my weight loss, and I can’t and never could do Remicaid because of my Multiple Sclerosis. So he gave me Elidel which is a steroid topical cream. Which just so happens to be a tier 3 drug, which just so happens to cost me $100. HOLY HELL. So now this pyoderma has cost me multiple trips to Cleveland, gas, food, doctor co pays and now a $100 in cream. Hopefully one tube will do it because I STILL HAVE NO JOB. I hate this thing. I HATE IT.

 

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